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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28739049">undying</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/willowsandwonders/pseuds/willowsandwonders'>willowsandwonders</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Angst with a Happy Ending, Brief Discussions of Animal Death, Gen, Resurrection, Temporary Character Death, aftermath of the doomsday stream, aka rip friend the immortal sheep</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:22:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,678</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28739049</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/willowsandwonders/pseuds/willowsandwonders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"There are a lot of things he should have done for Wilbur. He should have <em>been there,</em> for starters, even for the times he knew he wouldn’t be able to help. Especially for those times. But—But he’s here now. And this is something he can do. He can handle it, if it’s for his son."<br/>Or, the final death of a nation and the resurrection of the son that once died with it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Technoblade &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot &amp; Phil Watson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>83</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>undying</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hey everyone! just a couple quick notes:<br/>- I started writing this before the first resurrection attempt--I incorporated some of the canonical ritual elements but still put my own spin on it. I didn't want to fiddle with the glatt possession thing so that's not brought up in my story at all, rip glatt<br/>- as far as additional warnings go, I wasnt sure how to tag it but there are brief descriptions of temporary character death, both wilburs original death and the death required for the totem of undying to activate<br/>- I think there's still a consensus forming on the best way to tag stories in this fandom, if any of my tags are out of place let me know and I'll clean them up (sorry to anybody here looking for fics about minecraft itself)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The ghost that was his son is crying. The tears look off, Phil notices distantly. A little too thick to be water, fading into smoke as they drip off his face. It’s dark out, but Phil thinks they might look blue in the light. There’s not much about Wilbur that could surprise him at this point. This raw <em> grief, </em>though? It’s stronger than he expected.</p>
<p>Wi—<em> Ghostbur</em> is generally pretty easy to handle. Phil can usually soothe him the same way he did when Wilbur was a child, just with gentle words and time. Wilbur always trusted him to tell the truth. He believed Phil when he said that things would be alright in the end. </p>
<p>Wilbur does not believe him now. </p>
<p>And Phil, Phil <em> tries. </em> He’s just caught a little off guard by it all. He’s seen Ghostbur get upset, but usually he’ll pull out a bit of blue dye or a piece of lapis to fiddle with, and it’s enough to calm himself back down. And his memory is...not that great, besides, so he’s never in a bad mood for long. And Phil <em> was </em>worried that the sight of the new crater might rustle up some unpleasant feelings, was kind of hoping that Ghostbur would stay wherever he stayed until the deed was done and Phil had long fled. </p>
<p>But now Ghostbur is screaming at him, not-quite-tears streaming down his face, the edges of his form wispy and faded by the rain as he hovers in the air in front of him. His eyes are a flat, blank white. Compared to the living, Ghostbur has always looked a little...off. But now, the difference between him and when he was alive is striking. Most people would probably be afraid, if they saw him right now. But most people aren’t his dad. </p>
<p>Except the worst part of it all is, what Ghostbur’s saying, what he’s screaming with anguish, is true. Phil knew that Friend was in his house. He did. If the plan hadn’t been kicked into action early, he really <em> was </em>going to try and find a spare moment to lead that stupid sheep out into a field somewhere, where it might get lucky enough to dodge the wither blasts. He knows that Ghostbur is very attached to Friend. </p>
<p>Phil reminds him, voice gentle like he’s talking to a wounded animal, that Friend will come back. That’s why Phil wasn’t that worried about the sheep in the first place. Friend is…not quite a normal creature. If he had to guess, he’d say Friend is something of a spirit himself. He dies and just...shows up again, somewhere else. </p>
<p>That fact doesn’t seem to calm Ghostbur down, not even a little. He’s still crying, still yelling about how Phil has taken everything <em> away, </em>still melting in the rain drop by drop. </p>
<p>Phil stands there, in the storm, and finds himself thinking about a time when Wilbur was young, when one of their horses had an accident and was too hurt to ever heal. It had been raining that night too, he remembers. He’d told Wilbur to stay inside for a bit. But Wilbur must have snuck into the barn behind him, because Phil heard a startled cry from behind him as Phil did what he had to do. Wilbur had been completely inconsolable after, sick to his stomach and wailing. He thinks about what he told Wilbur then—</p>
<p>Sometimes bad things have to happen. </p>
<p>It’s just the way the world goes. The flood that leaves the soil rich and fertile for planting. The fires that rage but leave the forests healthier for it. The explosion to cut out the rot that was an oppressive government. It couldn’t be left standing. And they all had almost an entire day to move their things. Houses can be rebuilt. But this country has taken things from him, from <em> everyone, </em>that can’t be given back. He’s not sad to see it gone. </p>
<p>And that’s why he doesn’t apologize for what he did. He doesn’t want to see Ghostbur upset, but—but this is just how it <em>works. </em>Sometimes problems don’t have happy solutions. But there’s just—there’s no reasoning with Ghostbur when he’s this upset. He doesn’t want to hear it, so Phil stops offering it. All he says is another, less painful, truth—</p>
<p>That maybe one day Ghostbur will understand why Phil’s done all of this. Though if he’s honest with himself, deep in his heart, he’s not sure if that would be a good thing. After the life that Wilbur had, ignorance is a gift of its own. </p>
<p>Ghostbur leaves him standing there in the rain. Something in Phil’s chest feels hollow as he watches him go, his eyes catching on where the tear in the back of Ghostbur’s sweater should be. His fingers ache around a sword hilt that isn’t there. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Phil spends the next few days at home in the arctic. It’s not that he’s <em>avoiding </em>anything or anyone that might be haunting the ruins of the country that was, he’s just—well first of all, he would probably be killed on sight if he so much as set his eyes on that crater. And it isn’t like Ghostbur can’t make his own way to the arctic, especially with the break in the snow. Phil’s just, he’s had his hands full in the arctic, alright?</p>
<p>There are the obvious, predictable chores. Armor needs to be repaired, new potions need to be brewed, the spoils of war need to be carefully sifted through and organized. There are new machines to work on and old to repair, turtles to be tended to and a pen to be built for Techno’s dogs. </p>
<p>And Techno—Techno himself is...calling him a “chore” would be very rude, but. He does need to have an eye kept on him for a bit. Phil <em> saw </em>how quickly Tommy grew on him, no matter how much Techno tried to hide it from even himself. Wilbur was always the one closest to Tommy, the one who first took him under his wing, but Phil was friendly with him too, even if he didn’t see him as much. He’s the type that worms his way right into your heart without you noticing. It was kind of funny, watching that happen to Techno with each stupid question and every blustering threat. In some ways, Tommy reminded Phil of Techno when he was younger, so eager to face the world head on and go in swinging. </p>
<p>Tommy’s a good kid, and he’s been through a lot. Phil would’ve preferred to have him on their side, but he also knows when to cut his losses. Tommy made it crystal-fucking-clear that he couldn’t commit to staying on their side. Phil’s not <em> happy </em>about it, not at all, but if Tommy is willing to let them go, then he can return the favor. Spending hours and absolutely destroying his back tearing down Tommy’s eyesore of a cobblestone tower doesn’t exactly make Phil miss him any more, even if later he feels a little mean for thinking it. </p>
<p>But Techno is the kind of person who cares hard and <em> deep. </em>It’s hard to win his trust, and easy to lose it, but Phil has never seen someone with so much unwavering devotion to the people he cares about. Phil knows, objectively, that Techno would tear the world apart for him if he asked, any day. It’s a little dizzying to think about, so Phil tends not to, but it’s different watching Techno begin to tentatively reach out that loyalty towards someone new. </p>
<p>And that’s why Tommy’s stupid betrayal stings like a slap in the face. Phil can handle it just fine on his own, but god, Techno....he’s more upset than Phil’s seen him in a long time. He’d hoped that Techno would’ve let off some steam in battle, but now that he doesn’t have anything to throw himself into or train for, he’s just...quiet. He takes Carl and goes out on long rides and gives Phil gray hairs when he doesn’t come home until long after dark. </p>
<p>They don’t talk much about what happened. Phil comes home after an afternoon in the mines to find a crater in the rock where Tommy’s basement used to be, and he just sighs and gets to work making sure the house isn’t about to collapse and that it isn’t dark enough down there for monsters to crawl out of the shadows. </p>
<p>Techno takes to mostly ignoring the new kid that Phil couldn’t help but bring home, leaving Ranboo to his own devices, but also under the thinly veiled threat of retribution if he turns on them too. Techno stops wondering aloud when Ghostbur will come by next. And he doesn’t light any more lanterns so that the ghost can find the way to their cabin if he gets caught out in the snow. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Phil tries to break it to Techno gently over breakfast one morning, that Ghostbur was very upset with the both of them. He tries to emphasize that Ghostbur is mostly mad at <em> Phil, </em> and that Ghostbur very well may have forgotten about the whole thing already. And maybe Techno misunderstands him, doesn’t grasp that <em> Ghostbur </em>of all people could still grieve that deeply, but he makes some quip about how if Wilbur was still alive, he would have loved the show. Phil chokes a little on his toast at the thought, and he does his best to push the idea out of his mind. </p>
<p>He fails. It’s not the first time he’s considered what the <em> real </em> Wilbur would think about this whole mess Phil’s fallen into. Some nights it’s <em> all </em>he can think about, staring up at the ceiling and trying to convince himself that it’s mercy that Wilbur isn’t here to see all this. </p>
<p>Ghostbur…he has <em> some </em>idea of what’s been going on. Phil knows he’s been keeping—(had been keeping, before the explosion) records of history. He knows that Phil is the one who killed him, and he knows that it wasn’t without reason. But for the most part Ghostbur just...is. He drifts around, friend of everyone, greatest musician in town and always smiling. </p>
<p>Phil tries to do his part to separate Ghostbur from Wilbur, the <em> real </em>Wilbur. Ghostbur is fine enough, but at the end of the day he’s just a magic-born echo of someone that was. It’s just...hard, sometimes, when he catches sight of that sweater from the corner of his eye, sees him fiddle with his hair in that familiar unconscious motion, hears him pluck curiously at the strings of a guitar that’s been collecting dust. </p>
<p>How are you supposed to mourn someone who isn’t always gone?</p>
<p>Because there’s—there’s <em> glimpses </em> of the real Wilbur in there. Hell, as terrible as it was to get screamed at by Ghostbur, to see him so upset, that was also the closest he’d come to sounding...to sounding <em> real </em>since Phil first talked to him. </p>
<p>And he’s also heard the rumors, passed on to him by Ranboo, that Ghostbur wants to be revived. Which is a little startling—Ghostbur has always been adamant about being happier how he is now, but...Phil would be lying if he said he’d never thought about it himself. </p>
<p>In the end, he doesn’t have to think about the choice that hard. He thanks Ranboo for letting him know and then immediately loses the next day to squinting over ancient scrolls. </p>
<p>He’ll bring Wilbur back. He <em> will.  </em></p>
<p>But it quickly becomes apparent that Phil won’t be able to do this by himself. His knowledge on the subject is just too incomplete, the stakes too high for him to risk going in unaware. Ranboo starts helping before Phil even thinks to ask him, traveling to nearby villages and trading for more old tomes from the librarians there. He’s a good kid, that Ranboo. Phil’s not sure if he’s ready to risk getting attached, but he still does his best to make sure Ranboo feels appreciated for all his help.</p>
<p>Ranboo works hard to help him find information, but way out in the arctic there’s only so much. And the kid seems a little nervous at the prospect of going back to the mainland and asking the people there for help. Besides, it’s not Ranboo’s problem anyway. He never even got to meet Wilbur before he died. So Phil claps Ranboo on the back, thanks him for a job well done, and tells him to just focus on looking after the dogs and whatever other projects he has. </p>
<p>Phil does not have many allies on this server. Usually, he wouldn’t need them. Techno is more than enough, but this isn’t something Phil wants to burden him with right now. And after the whole bother with the withers, Phil figures most people would sooner stick a knife in him than help him, even if it’s for Ghostbur’s sake. But there <em> is </em>someone that might still work with him on this. </p>
<p>He sends a message to Eret. </p>
<p>Phil’s never really spoken to the supposed king of the SMP—hard to rationalize it when Phil’s quite literally allied with a staunch anarchist. But to his surprise, Eret is immediately amicable and on board to help. He says he’s a historian, has an extensive library that is bound to have something useful. </p>
<p>A plan starts to form. Eret’s job is to build the shrine. They’ll also use their sway to make sure that Phil isn’t attacked by anyone with sore feelings when they go to the edge of the crater for the ritual. Phil’s job is to get the totem of undying prepared. They’re practically nonexistent here, difficult to find and even more dangerous to get, except—except Phil already has one. A gift from Techno, to keep him safe.</p>
<p>He’ll make sure that Techno’s gift doesn’t go to waste. </p>
<p>Phil’s confident that the only way to bring Wilbur back is with Techno’s totem, activated at the right time and in the right place. Then Eret is the one to suggest trying to recreate the circumstances in which Wilbur died as closely as possible. Phil is the one who realizes he’ll need to use Wilbur’s old sword, the one he’s shamefully shoved into the corner of his ender chest. Someone will have to get the totem as close to Ghostbur as possible. And for the totem to activate, well… </p>
<p>There’s no way around it. There’s no one else he can ask this of. No one else he’d dream of trusting with it, not even Techno. Phil will have to be the one to die. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Phil needs to tell Techno about the ritual. There’s no way he’s heard about it from Ranboo—Tech doesn’t really talk to Ranboo without Phil there to break the ice, and Ranboo is too nervous about annoying him accidentally to bring up something big like this. And it’s not like there’s...really <em> anybody </em>else that Techno’s on speaking terms with for him to hear it from. Yikes.</p>
<p>And besides, Techno deserves to hear it from Phil. That doesn’t mean it’s any easier to say. Phil fumbles through the words, trying to explain the ritual, reassure that he’ll have to use the totem but it <em> will </em> work, and Ghostbur <em> wants </em>to come back—</p>
<p>And now Phil’s rolling the totem of undying back and forth between his hands, failing miserably at keeping his nerves from showing in his face and posture. Techno’s been quiet as he listened to Phil explain. There’s a small frown on his face. He knows that Techno and his son had...an interesting relationship towards the end. Allies in their own destruction. He can tell Techno’s not happy about this, but Phil needs to figure out where exactly his head’s at, and fast. </p>
<p>“Be honest with me, Phil. Are you gonna die?” It’s...not the question Phil expected. </p>
<p>And Phil has a lot of experience with handling Techno’s anxiety. Getting ahead of it before he can overthink things, calmly laying out what’s going on, all of that helps him break out of a spiral before it starts. Usually Phil isn’t that bothered by whatever’s freaking Techno out, which makes it easier to handle. But this? Both of them fear death. But Phil, who’s <em> never </em> had the option to respawn? The idea alone makes his skin crawl.</p>
<p>“I mean—yeah. Yeah, I’m gonna die.” And Christ he—he means to keep going, because that’s a fucking bummer of a sentence if there ever was one. But the words get stopped up in his throat. </p>
<p>“You’re gonna die,” Techno repeats. Phil can tell he’s trying to sound aloof, but he can hear the steel in his voice. If Phil wasn’t so busy trying not to freak out himself, he’d be touched that Techno is this worried about him. </p>
<p>“It’s—it’s the only way for the ritual to work. But you’ve used totems before, yeah? It’s not the greatest, but I’ll be right back, I’ll be back before you even know I’m gone.” He says the words with more conviction than he feels. He’d been doing a good job avoiding thinking about his impending death until now. </p>
<p>“When’s it happening?”</p>
<p>“Uh, soon. Really soon. Whenever everybody’s ready. Which...I think they’re just waiting on me? The shrine is already built.” </p>
<p>“The shrine.”</p>
<p>“Oh, yeah, that’s the other part of it. The totem is the most important bit, but the location needed to be significant. We’re doing it where he was—where he died.” <em> Or as close as we can get, considering the new crater, </em>Phil doesn’t say. </p>
<p>“If I show up in L’Manberg uninvited, someone’s probably gonna take a swing at me,” Techno says, fingers twitching almost imperceptibly to worry at the edge of his cloak. Phil hears the <em> “Sorry I can’t be there to watch” </em>hidden between the lines of it, and offers him a small smile. He knows that if Techno could somehow guarantee everything would go perfectly, he’d stop at nothing to make it so. </p>
<p>“It won’t take long. Maybe after we can stop by for dinner.” Phil punctuates that with a chuckle that definitely comes out a <em> little </em> forced, but Techno mercifully doesn’t call him out on it. To be honest, Phil hasn’t thought much about the <em> after. </em>The idea of him, Wilbur, and Tech sitting all around a table again...that hasn’t happened for a very long time. </p>
<p>Techno takes a deep breath. “I trust you, Phil. If you think it’ll go right, then it’ll be fine.”</p>
<p>“It’ll be fine,” Phil echoes, because if he doesn’t go into this confidently, he won’t be able to go into it at all.</p>
<p>“And besides,” Techno says with a wry grin, “If it doesn’t work out the way you want, you can always just kill him again.”</p>
<p>“Little too soon to be making jokes like that, bud.”</p>
<p>“Sorry.”</p>
<p>“You’re not sorry.” Techno snorts. </p>
<p>“Nah. Have fun at the ritual, don’t die more than you have to.” </p>
<p>“I will. Try not to terrorize Ranboo too much while I’m gone. You know he’s a little wary of you, and you can’t just keep staring at him, he really—“</p>
<p>“Phil, I’ve never done anything intimidating in my life.”</p>
<p>“You’re so full of shit.” </p>
<p>Techno laughs in earnest. “Phil, Phil, I am a delight to be around and loved by all my peers.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, yeah.” It’s good to hear Techno joking around again, at least. But it’s time for Phil to go, before he loses what little nerve he’s gathered.</p>
<p>“Well alright Techno, I’m gonna go raise my son from the dead.”</p>
<p>“Just a quick errand.” </p>
<p>“Oh, fuck off.” Phil snorts, tucking the totem in his pocket for safekeeping. “And I meant what I said about Ranboo, alright, you two will get along fine if you just—“</p>
<p>“We’ll be <em> fine, </em> go un-murder your son already,” Techno says, punctuating it by putting  his hands on Phil’s shoulders and pushing him towards the door.</p>
<p>And Phil goes. He squares back his shoulders, gives a little wave to Ranboo as he passes by, and trudges out into the snow. The diamond sword hangs heavy at his side, the totem in his pocket clinking against it with every step. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As Phil carefully picks his way across the nether bridges towards the portal to the mainland, he thinks about his son. His first steps. How when he was three he’d always steal Phil’s hat and never want to take it off. How excited he was the first time he got to see a fox up close. The first song he ever played for Phil on guitar, little voice wobbly and strings terribly out of tune. </p>
<p>The first time he snuck out at night to try fighting monsters like dad. When he met Techno for the first time and the other kid wanted to spar with him, because fighting and winning was all he cared about doing back then. The first time he took Wil to the Nether, and Phil nearly got charred by a ghast trying to get him some glowstone to put in his room. </p>
<p>When he finally let Wilbur go explore a ravine on his own and Phil stood on the porch and watched him go. The lanterns they made together every summer, his son cheering as his lifted off into the night sky. The time Wilbur almost burned down the kitchen trying to surprise Phil with a cake for his birthday. The first time Phil had to give him stitches, after an undead with a sword caught them both by surprise. </p>
<p>The day Wilbur left home. The letters he got from him, first weekly, then monthly, and finally just whenever. All the times Phil almost went to him, a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach, only to slump back down in his chair. Hearing from Techno that Wilbur was an exile of a country he’d created. That he was fighting in wars. Going to his son too late, saying words that weren’t enough to convince him, couldn’t <em> stop </em>him—</p>
<p>The look in his eyes when he asked Phil to kill him. The awful grin on his face when Phil obliged. </p>
<p>There are a lot of things he should have done for Wilbur. He should have <em> been there </em>, for starters, even for the times he knew he wouldn’t be able to help. Especially for those times. But—But he’s here now. And this is something he can do. He can handle it, if it’s for his son. </p>
<p>He repeats this to himself, over and over, as he steps into the nether hub’s portal and lets it take him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Phil gets to the shrine, Ghostbur is there waiting for him. </p>
<p>There are others there too—Eret, who he expected. Tommy, sullen and quiet, who Phil tries not to look at too long, but doesn’t have the heart to ask to leave. Tubbo, looking on curiously.</p>
<p>And Fundy—gods, and Fundy. Eret must have told him. Phil’s stomach flips just looking at him. Twin memories rise at the sight of his grandson—Ranboo, looking down at the ground and tail lashing nervously as he told Phil they shouldn’t trust him. Sitting on the end of a dock with Fundy, fishing and talking and laughing until the sun went down. And then a third memory, of Fundy standing over him and spitting that Phil was dead to him. Phil shakes his head, trying to clear his thoughts. There will be time for all that later. </p>
<p>Phil turns his attention back to Ghostbur. He hasn’t seen him since their fight, after the withers and everything else. Ghostbur now is a far cry from how he looked then; today, his form is solid and he’s barely transparent at all. He’s nervous; Phil can tell from the slight hunch of his shoulders and the way his fingertips are subtly worrying at the sleeve of his sweater. But he still does his best to give Phil a bright grin as he walks up. </p>
<p>The enormity of it all begins to creep up on him. </p>
<p>Eret runs them through the theatrical part of the ritual. Phil feels a bit silly (and a bit sad) going through what he remembers saying to Wil on the day he died. But it at least somewhat keeps his mind off of the actual necromancy part of this ritual that’s about to follow. </p>
<p>Ghostbur does his best to say his part, and even giggles a little when he butchers one of his lines.  But the time comes when the words have all been said and it’s just the two of them standing on the shrine. Phil draws the diamond sword. The tips of Ghostbur’s hair go a little wispy, his blank eyes wide and nervous. </p>
<p>“Do we have to?” Ghostbur asks, voice small. </p>
<p>“Eret explained how the ritual works to you, yeah?” Ghostbur nods. “You’ve just gotta give me one quick poke, and then you’ll be back. It won’t even hurt.” Phil does his best to smile. He’s not entirely sure who he’s trying to reassure, here. </p>
<p>Ghostbur’s hands are shaking. Phil hears voices behind him, distant like they’re underwater, of Tommy and Tubbo and Eret and Fundy both murmuring to each other. Phil thinks about how long it’s been since he got to see Wilbur smile without death in his eyes. He lets himself have a little bit of that dangerous hope that he still might get to see that smile again. </p>
<p>He loves Wilbur very much. That’s what he wants his last thought to be, as he gently places the sword hilt into Ghostbur’s palm with one hand, and tightly grips the totem in his other. </p>
<p>But as Ghostbur looks at him, anguish clearly written on his face as he plunges the sword into his father’s chest, one last thought darts through his head—</p>
<p> —<em> I am afraid.  </em></p>
<p>It hurts. And then it’s nothing at all. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He will remember it later, in parts. How his lungs froze on an inhale as the sword slid through them. How one of Ghostbur’s arms flew up to desperately wind around Phil’s shoulders, holding him close as he slumped down onto the sword. The confusion Phil felt through a thick layer of fog, that his legs weren’t holding him up like they were supposed to. </p>
<p>The painful buzz of magic, the sparks of green and gold taking over his vision. The awful <em> tug </em> at his soul as it slipped towards the void and was yanked back up again. The magic in the air spread dangerously thin as it hooked around not one soul, but two. A sword being cautiously pulled out of him by hands that are warm and <em> real. </em>A gash through his chest unwriting itself and sealing up into a pale white scar.</p>
<p>Wilbur, alive and kneeling on the ground in front of him. In that moment, all Phil can do is stare. </p>
<p>His son, his <em> living son </em> is staring back at him. Phil doesn’t—he doesn’t know what to <em> do. </em> And that’s how he finds himself in a heap on the floor, disgusting blood still drying on his shirt, throwing his head back and <em> laughing.  </em></p>
<p>The day Wilbur died, he never thought he’d laugh again. </p>
<p>And Wilbur, (Wilbur!), is just looking at him, blinking owlishly at his father, who has clearly just lost his mind a little.</p>
<p>“Hey, Wil.” He manages to keep his voice steady for all of two words before he’s pulling Wilbur close and saying—</p>
<p>“C’mere, c’mere, my <em> son, </em> you’re back! Ohhh my gods, you’re <em> back.”  </em></p>
<p>“Yeah,” Wilbur says, breathless. The diamond sword clatters to the ground next to them as Wilbur throws his arms around Phil too.</p>
<p>And there’s so much more Phil wants to say to him—<em> I love you, you died, I </em> killed you, <em> I thought I’d lost you for good, I’m never letting you out of my bloody sight ever again— </em></p>
<p>But for now, Phil just holds his son as tightly as he can, and laughs so hard he cries.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you very much for reading!<br/>I'm sure that a lot of this will be swiftly rendered non-canon when the actual resurrection happens, but I had a ton of fun writing it. dsmp philza minecraft is very interesting so I had a great time exploring his character and his perspective on recent events. this would be a completely different story if it was from the perspective of ghostbur, tommy, etc--collaborative storytelling is super neat<br/>thanks again for reading, feel free to drop a comment if youve got any questions about this story or if anything caught your eye!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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